The Anatomy of Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham

I'm a commercial Hindi cinema junkie. I like to specify commercial because for me no Hindi movie is complete without atleast half a dozen songs and since studios such as Yashraj Films, Nadiadwala Grandson Entertainment and Dharma Productions, to name a few, never disappoint, I ensure that my Ladakh Trip Fund savings get depleted slightly every month.

This weekend, however, has been about repeat telecasts of Hindi cinema's gems over the past two decades. My Saturday was spent in watching the wedding video a.k.a Hum Aapke Hain Koun...! and Sunday was productively utilised in watching a rotund kid transform into the chiseled Hrithik Roshan interspersed with a zillion advertisements that turns a 3 hour movie into one that spans over 5 hours. All hail commercialism.

Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham (K3G because it sounds 'kewl') is a movie about loving your parents which the Shravan Kumar of the modern India, Karan Johar, emphasises in the title card. The ensemble cast of the movie consists stalwarts of Hindi cinema namely Amitabh Bachchan, Jaya Bachchan, Shahrukh Khan, Kajol, Hrithik Roshan and Kareena Kapoor. A super hit formula.

The movie's premise is quite simple. There's a wealthy North Indian Family, whose patriarch is named Yashvardhan Raichand, very apt considering how wealthy they are, who lives with his wife and two sons and mother and mother-in-law and a battery of servants in a haveli which mysteriously resembles a castle somewhere in Great Britain. But they are this traditional Indian family wherein it is mandatory for everybody to go to boarding school and they get to come back on Diwali day in a private chopper.

Then Shahrukh Khan who is obviously called Rahul is scheduled to marry Rani Mukherjee's character but he isn't interested in a sophisticated girl and chooses Kajol's character who is high on hormones, over her. She also has a knack for calling things by unconvential names, for example, a flower pot is a 'gamla' which our Rahul finds immensely charming. He confesses his love for her in a dream sequence where he's wearing a transparent shirt and crooning to Sonu Nigam's voice at an exotic beach location. But Sr. B who is the patriarch, who otherwise is a man of high ideals, is completely opposed to the idea of having a girl from Chandni Chowk as his bahu, so in a fit of rage he tells Rahul that the latter is an adopted son and that he should leave the mansion. The women of the house including the two grannies and the mother, Sr. Mrs. B have little say in this.

A few years later, the quintessential 'behenji' schoolgirl who happened to be Kajol's characters sister has transformed into this college hottie, now portrayed by Kareena Kapoor who is prefers people calling her 'Poo'. And the podgy brother of Rahul , earlier known as Laddoo, has grown an extra finger and turned into Hrithik Roshan. Poo and Laddoo obviously fall in love and dance in synthetic leather costumes and Rahul who is unaware of Laddoo's real identity (for obvious reasons) let's him stay in his house at the behest of his patriotic wife. Hindustani hi hindustani ki madad karega naa. Then this hindustani, teaches Rahul's son the Indian National Anthem to be performed at the school annual day and then reveals his true identity to everyone.

A few song and dance sequences, Karva chouth festival and modern day renditions of 'bhajans' and some umpteen songs later, the senior grandmother expresses her desire to see all the male members of the family together before she dies. Thus, they return back to India and a couple of emotional speeches later, the family unites again. And yes, Laddoo and Poo do get married.

Credits roll.