The Common Wealth Games are round the corner. This is a turning point in the sporting history of our glorious nation. Infact, it is adding 4 moons (chaar chaand) to the glory of India. And like my 4th standard Hindi teacher always said, every experience in life is a lesson learnt. These are a few things that the Common Wealth Games have made me aware of even before they've begun. Wonder how many more lessons are yet to come. Anyway so here it goes...
- Revolutionising phrases in the national language: "Apne pairon par kulhaadi maarna" is passe. The contemperary jazzy version is " Apne pairon par Kalmadi maarna."
- The Common Wealth Games officials tend to take everything in a very literal sense. This includes the term "common wealth" amounting to over $6 billion.
- When they say that the country has gone to the dogs, they don't mean it in a metaphorical sense. The dogs are free to poop inside apartments on beds meant for athletes. Why does PETA have so many issues anyway.
- In saying that our standards of hygiene are different from the ones observed in other countries, Lalit Bhanot has made it clear that we don't flush toilets after use and use bedsheets soiled with dog crap for sleeping.
- That the Games have managed to show that no job is small or insignificant. Case in point: when the top bosses of Scotland had to sweep their apartments in the Games Village.
- That AR Rahman is no Shakira and that he definitely cannot compose a Waka Waka inspired anthem. Yes that was the brief given to him by the CWG officials. sigh.
- That the foot over bridge collapse that managed to injure about 27 "ordinary" people (in the words of Sheila Dikshit) is another example of "Bade bade desho mein aisi chhoti chhoti baatein hoti rehti hain."(inspiration RR Patil who was inspired by DDLJ). And it isn't that bad a thing considering India is already grappling with excessive population.
- That inspite of lack of practice, Indian athletes will manage to win Gold, Silver and Bronze medals in all the disciplines. It's a different issue that this will be on account of no other contingent taking part.
- That I'm not the only one who has a habit of procrastinating. The CWG officials are miles ahead. It has probably got something to do with our Examination system which habituates us into cramming everything for the last moment.
- That our news channels still take pride in bringing exclusive Breaking News related to the corruption in CWG. And that Arnab Goswami's vocal cords are still extremely elastic.
Many more lessons to come. Stay tuned! :)
